hard habit to break

your my hard habit to break.

i am so used to this kind of situation with you. i am so used to us.
and i dont know if i am tired. but my emotions right now, are speechless.

nothing much to say. tired. scared. mixed emotions with nothing much to offer.

well, llis told me that i saw this comming. i was stubborn. or hopeful.

i dont know. yeah i am stubborn.

from 1 -10, i put you as my seven. yeah just seven. yet ask why i am still here.

i am hopeful. but emotionally exhausted. really emotionally exhausted.

maybe you rate me as a 7 too. that's why ur treating me like this.

i know you've changed. and so many things tells me you've changed.

but yet, a big part of me tells me to back out. run away.

for you can suddenly changed your mind and leave me in the middle of somewhere. that i can't wait to happen.

this is an unfamiliar territory. this things, i know nothing much. my knowledge in psychology fails me here.

i am still praying that we can fix the "us" part. but prayers are not helpful, if each of us is uncooperative.

ron told me, i dont have to decide now. not soon. he told me to enjoy what's left and try to nurture it.

i will delay the decision making for now. well, i am not the only one to decide. you, too, have to decide

there are many better things to think about. i dont need to waste my neurons for something like this.

i am still here. i still put you as my seven.

but i hope you can help me changed my mind.