ang buhay ko minsan, nakakapagod.
hindi ko malaman kung paano patakbuhin.
kilala ko ang sarili ko, pero ang mga tao sa paligid ko minsan mahirap tantyahin.
mahirap mangapa ng damdamin, lalo na yung mga taong sa una pa lamang sarado na agad ang pintuan pati bintana para sa iyo.
wala namang problema sana, kaya kng manuyo at makisama. pero ang mas natatakot ako
mas natatakot ako sa sarili ko, pag nagasawa ako.
pag mas pinili ko na lamang mawalan ng kiber o paki alam sa mga tao sa paligid ko, sa sitwasyon ko.
kasi alam kong klahit anong pilit ko, ako naman ang pilit na magsasara ng sariling mundo
mahihirapang bumukas, ni pang unawa hindi ko na kayang ibigay.
nakakapagod kasing manuyo, makibagay.
mahirap. nakakapagod. nakakayamot. mabigat ang pakiramdam
kaya pag nangyari iyon, pasensyahan na lang.
sa ngayon kaya ko pa makibagay, makisabay.
pero pag nasagad na hanggang dulo
pasensya, alang samaan ng loob.
tulad mo, ako ren ay tao lamang.
Tuesday, November 15, 2005
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
ang pagiging socially responsible
med mission again.
saan daw? Talao-talao
quezon po iyon.
anong meron?
lahat andun. lahat ng gusto kong gawen andun.
kakapagod iyon, pero kaya.
sana hindi mapolitika.
sana maayos matatapos.
salamat sa pagkakataong ito.
saan daw? Talao-talao
quezon po iyon.
anong meron?
lahat andun. lahat ng gusto kong gawen andun.
kakapagod iyon, pero kaya.
sana hindi mapolitika.
sana maayos matatapos.
salamat sa pagkakataong ito.
Friday, November 04, 2005
ang part three
ang part three ay tungkol sa taong dapt naging kasama ko sa baclaran trip.
btw, it was bad trip after all. didn't push through.
the whole vacation, everytime na sumasagi yung idea sa isip ko...i will always end up with telling myself to have no expectations, no false hopes . pero maniniwala sa mga surprises na pedeng dumating sa buhay maybe not coming from him but from life itself.
malabokase cia eh. he is not permanently persistent. pasulpot-sulpot lang. and i don't understand kung ano ba talaga. he never said he is courting me. but his friends says he is. he is asking me out but malas lang talaga, wala pa natuloy sa mga balak namen. drawing kc yun eh.
nakaka alala lang pag gusto nia. pag nakakainom ata. hahaha
i don't know if he really is that torpe or just not that in to me.
kagabe, we were together with friends. sa bahay ng pinsan ko. me konte inuman. didn't drink kc pale pilsen ung ini-inom nila. he offered me a coke sakto. part pa naman ng diet ko ang hinde mag soft drink, pero hinde na ako nakahinde, nabili na nia. and helo, can i say no to him. No!
yesterday, was something. although not confirmed ang mga bagay bagay at hinde galeng sa kanya. Naconfirm ng mga friends nia. alam ko may something. i just know.
all of his friends na hinde ko kakilala, eh kilala ako at associated sa kanya. talk about something huh?
nakwento pa nia, yung bayaw joke nia sa kapatid ko.
maisip talaga akong tao, kaya ren siguro ganito ako.
actually, for the last three months hinde naman kame nagkikita eh. text lang. so it was my first time to see him again after three months. ang cute ng feeling. basta it was nice to see him smile. cute!
hindi ako kinikilig pero masaya ako.
but i know hanggang hinde confirmed alam ko na non-sense ang lahat ng ito. i have heard a lot of similar stories na katulad ng sa akin pero hinde maganda ang ending. It was all assumptions, making the girl on the loosing end.
i think 50-50 chance na pedeng sad ending ng istorya kong ito. but i will stay for a while, because i like what i i have now. i like this, even though i don't understand the full terms and condition of "this". kahet na ako lang ang nag-aassume na may "this". kc alam ko, pag wala namang nangyare magsasawa den ako.
i might get hurt i don't care, everybody gets hurt. lilipas den yung kung magkakataon.
i will just stay here for a while, still wait for surprises
malay ba naten na sa kakahintay ko sa kakupadan nia, makilala ko yung god's best ko
pedeng hinde cia...hehehe
basta
i know and understand perfectly the "this" situation i am into. i'll stay for a while.
well that's enough update for now.
btw, it was bad trip after all. didn't push through.
the whole vacation, everytime na sumasagi yung idea sa isip ko...i will always end up with telling myself to have no expectations, no false hopes . pero maniniwala sa mga surprises na pedeng dumating sa buhay maybe not coming from him but from life itself.
malabokase cia eh. he is not permanently persistent. pasulpot-sulpot lang. and i don't understand kung ano ba talaga. he never said he is courting me. but his friends says he is. he is asking me out but malas lang talaga, wala pa natuloy sa mga balak namen. drawing kc yun eh.
nakaka alala lang pag gusto nia. pag nakakainom ata. hahaha
i don't know if he really is that torpe or just not that in to me.
kagabe, we were together with friends. sa bahay ng pinsan ko. me konte inuman. didn't drink kc pale pilsen ung ini-inom nila. he offered me a coke sakto. part pa naman ng diet ko ang hinde mag soft drink, pero hinde na ako nakahinde, nabili na nia. and helo, can i say no to him. No!
yesterday, was something. although not confirmed ang mga bagay bagay at hinde galeng sa kanya. Naconfirm ng mga friends nia. alam ko may something. i just know.
all of his friends na hinde ko kakilala, eh kilala ako at associated sa kanya. talk about something huh?
nakwento pa nia, yung bayaw joke nia sa kapatid ko.
maisip talaga akong tao, kaya ren siguro ganito ako.
actually, for the last three months hinde naman kame nagkikita eh. text lang. so it was my first time to see him again after three months. ang cute ng feeling. basta it was nice to see him smile. cute!
hindi ako kinikilig pero masaya ako.
but i know hanggang hinde confirmed alam ko na non-sense ang lahat ng ito. i have heard a lot of similar stories na katulad ng sa akin pero hinde maganda ang ending. It was all assumptions, making the girl on the loosing end.
i think 50-50 chance na pedeng sad ending ng istorya kong ito. but i will stay for a while, because i like what i i have now. i like this, even though i don't understand the full terms and condition of "this". kahet na ako lang ang nag-aassume na may "this". kc alam ko, pag wala namang nangyare magsasawa den ako.
i might get hurt i don't care, everybody gets hurt. lilipas den yung kung magkakataon.
i will just stay here for a while, still wait for surprises
malay ba naten na sa kakahintay ko sa kakupadan nia, makilala ko yung god's best ko
pedeng hinde cia...hehehe
basta
i know and understand perfectly the "this" situation i am into. i'll stay for a while.
well that's enough update for now.
part2
ang second theme ng vacation ko eh about life and motherhood.
can't belive my only single female cousin in the philippines, who is also the same age as me, is already married. I went to batangas to witness their simple civil wedding.
parang dream ang lahat. parang naglalaro lang. at pagdating ko dun, the afternoon before their wedding, kakabili pa lang nila ng ring kase akala daw nila di na kailangan ng ring pag civil wedding lang. oh di ba para silang naglalaro lang. they are just completing the requirements pero hinde ko alam if she or both them really know that their entering into a lifelong committment.
mahirap yung pinasok ng pinsan ko. i know napasubo ren cia. a baby is on the way na kase. but i know it was a decision na mahirap para sa kanya. ksae kilala ko yun eh. parehas kameng marameng dreams sa buhay. marameng gustong puntahan, marating, at maging sa pag lipas ng araw.
but she have a different path now. kc may aakayin na ciang little kid along the way at i add mo pa yung asawa nia. wow. major change ng plans.
well, i know she will learn to be mature along the way. i know that her husband will mature enough for the three of them. kilala ko naman yung mapapangasawa nia. medyo matagal na reng kakilala ng pamilya ko. and he is nice guy. mas marunong pa nga siyang mag luto kesa sa pinsan ko.
so that was the 2nd week.
the 3rd week was spent for buying candles and visiting the people who have left us earlier this year.
everytime i remember this people, nandun paren yung a feeling of sadness. naiiyak paren ako. and m hoping masaya sila sa kung saan man sila naroon.
can't belive my only single female cousin in the philippines, who is also the same age as me, is already married. I went to batangas to witness their simple civil wedding.
parang dream ang lahat. parang naglalaro lang. at pagdating ko dun, the afternoon before their wedding, kakabili pa lang nila ng ring kase akala daw nila di na kailangan ng ring pag civil wedding lang. oh di ba para silang naglalaro lang. they are just completing the requirements pero hinde ko alam if she or both them really know that their entering into a lifelong committment.
mahirap yung pinasok ng pinsan ko. i know napasubo ren cia. a baby is on the way na kase. but i know it was a decision na mahirap para sa kanya. ksae kilala ko yun eh. parehas kameng marameng dreams sa buhay. marameng gustong puntahan, marating, at maging sa pag lipas ng araw.
but she have a different path now. kc may aakayin na ciang little kid along the way at i add mo pa yung asawa nia. wow. major change ng plans.
well, i know she will learn to be mature along the way. i know that her husband will mature enough for the three of them. kilala ko naman yung mapapangasawa nia. medyo matagal na reng kakilala ng pamilya ko. and he is nice guy. mas marunong pa nga siyang mag luto kesa sa pinsan ko.
so that was the 2nd week.
the 3rd week was spent for buying candles and visiting the people who have left us earlier this year.
everytime i remember this people, nandun paren yung a feeling of sadness. naiiyak paren ako. and m hoping masaya sila sa kung saan man sila naroon.
mga updates ng buhay ko!
ang sabe ni aj, mag-update daw ako sa blog ko.
so eto na iyon...
malapit na matapos ang almost 1 month vacation from school ( 26 days to exact) and i may say that i did have a different vacation this time.
actually family ang theme ng vacation ko kc halos buong bakasyon ko was spent with or for my family.
the first week was different. I went to bohol for a week. Panglao beach kame nagpunta. I had some tan. Syempre brown na ako lalo pa akong naging brown. hahaha. Nakakita na ren ako ng tarsier and nakita ko ren ang wonderful chocolate hills
it was a nature trip. Sobrang parang wino-worship ko ang kagandahan ng beach, dahel talagang halos araw-araw ng stay ko dun nakababad ako sa tubig (8 days ako sa bohol).
Chocolate hills is better in real life kesa picture. Pucha! ang green ng paligid, yung feeling na you want to inhale-exhale more often para mapalitan ang hanging pumapaloob sa aking baga. pakshet sa ganda!
one sad story i heard while we were in one of the peaks para i view ang chocolate hills, and sobrang sama ng dating governor ng bohol kase pina-quarry nia ang isa sa mga hills. grabe naman yun. stupid things pipol do for money. pero at least na-impeach na yun.
so that was my bohol trip.
when i got back to manila, i spent the next five days buying pasalubong for families para ipadala naman sa canada.
pagkatapos nun, went back to batangas and attend ang super mabilisang wedding ng pinsan ko.
post ko na muna to.
so eto na iyon...
malapit na matapos ang almost 1 month vacation from school ( 26 days to exact) and i may say that i did have a different vacation this time.
actually family ang theme ng vacation ko kc halos buong bakasyon ko was spent with or for my family.
the first week was different. I went to bohol for a week. Panglao beach kame nagpunta. I had some tan. Syempre brown na ako lalo pa akong naging brown. hahaha. Nakakita na ren ako ng tarsier and nakita ko ren ang wonderful chocolate hills
it was a nature trip. Sobrang parang wino-worship ko ang kagandahan ng beach, dahel talagang halos araw-araw ng stay ko dun nakababad ako sa tubig (8 days ako sa bohol).
Chocolate hills is better in real life kesa picture. Pucha! ang green ng paligid, yung feeling na you want to inhale-exhale more often para mapalitan ang hanging pumapaloob sa aking baga. pakshet sa ganda!
one sad story i heard while we were in one of the peaks para i view ang chocolate hills, and sobrang sama ng dating governor ng bohol kase pina-quarry nia ang isa sa mga hills. grabe naman yun. stupid things pipol do for money. pero at least na-impeach na yun.
so that was my bohol trip.
when i got back to manila, i spent the next five days buying pasalubong for families para ipadala naman sa canada.
pagkatapos nun, went back to batangas and attend ang super mabilisang wedding ng pinsan ko.
post ko na muna to.
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